As a little girl I dreamed of getting married and changing my last name over into something much more common and acceptable by all others. I was tired of people calling me everything but my last name. The children at school made fun of my last name on a daily basics, until eventually I hated it. By the time my teenage years rolled around I felt like my last name was a curse. My dad was so popular that the mention of my last name made people interested in what I was doing. No teenager wants to be identified by their dads’ associates when they are out trying to have a good time. Now as a young adult I am much more appreciative of the uniqueness of my Family’s name. The name Fyffe is special to me. I like that whenever I hear that name in a room full of people I know it has to be me. I have never bumped into another Fyffe that wasn’t family.
After being married I elected not to take my husbands last name. At first it was just too much of a hassle and too much work to get it done. But the longer I went on using my maiden name the more I realized that there was a bigger issue. I was not at all eager to let go of my daddy’s name. Its unique, uncommon, unusual and I liked it much more than my husbands last name. I tried to tell him that his last name is very common and ordinary and I am no ordinary girl, he knew this when he married me. Of course he was offended by my decision and applied pressure every chance he got.
So I ask you this: Is it so wrong to want to hold on to my daddy’s last name? Is this what leave and cleave means? Is it really disrespectful if you decide to keep the name you were born with when you got married? I mean isn’t it a little more disrespectful to just discard of your father’s last name? I am sure there is blood sweat and tears in all of our fathers name.
I have grown to love my name and now I am torn between letting go of it and accepting my husband’s name. In the end any decision to change my name will be to avoid questions from my son, such as; “mommy, why is your last name different from me and my daddy’s name?” In this modern world women should not feel pressured to accept their husbands last name, because unless your husband is royalty the only advantage to owning his last name is to appear uniform on paper as a family. That’s just my opinion. With all we as women go through, do we really need the extra paperwork?
I wonder if I will visit here soon..
He knew u were “no ordinary girl” jus like how u knew his last name was “ordinary and common” lol! You marry the man u might as well take his last name too! Lol, for now I’ll enjoy the name, and when I get marry, my Husband’s name will be an extension.